Seven years ago I joined the staff at St. Xavier Church as a Pastoral Associate. My major responsibility was to be the primary contact in scheduling the 60 or so weddings that are held at our beautiful church each year. I had some basic information as to how this responsibility was to be carried out. But like most new jobs, there was a huge learning curve in determining how to actually accomplish the task.
One thing I knew from being a parishioner here was this simple truth: it is very important to be welcoming. When our family first started attending Mass here, the one thing we felt immediately was the warmth of the people we met. I wanted to project that sense of welcome to everyone with whom I spoke as a Pastoral Minister. I also came to admire the Jesuit charism of men and women for others. This is a very generous parish: in time, talents and treasure. As a pastoral minister in our parish, I felt it essential to meet the engaged couples ‘where they were’ and to do my very best to help them receive the sacrament of Matrimony with no preconceived judgments, and to do so with an open heart.
Weddings are joyful celebrations! The journey each couple travels to arrive at that moment of joy and commitment is always unique. The sacrament itself is one of service. The priest asks the bride and groom individually if they have come of their own free will to give themselves to the other in marriage; if they will honor and love one another as husband and wife for the rest of their lives; and if they will accept children from God lovingly and bring them up according to the law of Christ and his Church.
By saying ‘yes’ to these questions, the couple pledges their lives to each other with the hope that they can ultimately help each other reach the goal of eternal life together with God. “I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. I will love you and honor you all the days of my life.” Those of us who have exchanged vows had no idea then of what the promises would involve.
Every time I attend one of the weddings at St X, I am struck by the commitment and the optimism and the love. It is a fulfilling and wonderful vocation, but there are times when it is also very difficult to live out. It is only through the help and grace of God that married life (or any vocation) can be as fulfilling and rich as it is meant to be.
Each week we print the names of couples who have promised forever to each other. Let’s take a moment to pray for them that God’s grace be with them always. As St Paul says in our second reading: “We always pray for you, that our God may make you worthy of His calling and powerfully bring to fulfillment every good purpose and every effort of faith.”
Mrs. Kathy England, Pastoral Associate